Three Practices to Feel More Alive: Being Seen, Staying Connected, and Making Life Fun Again
The Quest of Life
Mindset & Meaningful Living
Read Time: ~6 minutes
Today at a Glance
This week, we’re diving into three subtle but powerful ways to bring more meaning into your days:
Why being seen (and helping others feel seen) is one of the most underrated needs in adulthood
How taking notes on your friends can keep relationships alive even when life gets busy
Why this weird in-between season of the year might be stealing your joy—and how to bring fun back on purpose
Let’s get into it.
1. We All Want to Be Seen
And most of us rarely feel that way.
The other day, someone asked me:
“What’s a quality you admire most in other people?”
I had an immediate answer:
“People who go out of their way to make sure others feel involved.”
Especially in group settings—inviting the quiet person in, asking questions that let someone feel like their presence matters.
Then they flipped the script and asked something I wasn’t expecting:
“Do you think you admire that so much because you don’t often feel seen yourself?”
That hit.
Because yeah—I’ve been in a lot of rooms lately where I’ve felt invisible. Not in a dramatic way, just... unacknowledged. Especially over the past few months while prepping for my competition, working on my app, and pouring energy into things that aren’t always easy to explain.
Meanwhile, the group conversations are about fun nights out, dating drama, and vacation plans. Not bad things. Just not my things.
And that taught me something: if I could feel this disconnected after just a few months of living differently, how many people are walking through life feeling this way all the time?
So here’s your challenge:
👉 Make people feel seen.
Ask about something they’re excited about.
Pause and ask them why that lights them up.
Text them out of the blue to check in on something they mentioned months ago.
You never know what that might mean to someone.
2. Take Notes on Your Friends
Seriously. It’s not weird—it’s thoughtful.
Two of my close friends from college visited me in Denver last weekend to go skiing. We spent the weekend catching up, laughing, reminiscing—and having the kinds of deep conversations that only happen when you're away from the noise.
And after they left, I jotted down a few notes in my phone:
The sprint triathlon they're training for
The beautiful, surprising parts of marriage they’ve discovered
Exciting family updates
An inside joke we shared
Their shared dream of opening a coffee shop one day
It wasn’t about being organized. It was about being intentional.
Because as we get older, it’s so easy for relationships to atrophy. We move, we change, we get busy. And next thing you know, you haven’t talked to someone you used to love for a year.
Here’s what I’ve learned:
Notes give you something to follow up on.
They help keep the relationship warm even when time and distance get in the way.
They show people you care enough to remember.
Also—your friends are growing, evolving, going through stuff you haven’t. They've probably experienced things you haven't yet: marriage, kids, career shifts, burnout, heartbreak, joy, identity changes.
When you take notes and ask deeper questions, you're not just being a good friend—you're learning from the life happening around you.
So try it: After your next catch-up, write down a few things. Next time you talk, you’ll have more to say than just “So… what’s new?”.
3. Make Life Fun Again (On Purpose)
This time of year is strange.
The newness of January is long gone. Summer isn't quite here. Work feels like the same old grind, the weather is inconsistent, and everything feels... meh. It’s easy to feel like you’re just stuck in another repeat of the same year.
And this is exactly when people start to quietly drift into:
Monotony
Burnout
The age old question of "Is this all there is?"
Here’s the fix: inject joy back into your routine—on purpose.
Here’s how I’ve been doing it lately:
🧠 At Work:
Find one part of my job that actually interests me and spending time on it each week—even if it’s not my main priority.
Work from at least one new coffee shop each week, and make sure to try a sweet treat while I'm there.
🤝 Socially:
Schedule lunch meetups with people I haven’t seen in a while.
Prioritize 1:1 time. No pressure. No agenda. Just something new.
🎨 Personally:
Say yes to when people ask you to do something.
Play pickup basketball. Go to a different gym just because the vibe is better. Drive to a different grocery store because you haven’t been there before.
Try new creative outlets—even if they lead nowhere.
The key is: you have to seek fun.
It doesn’t just show up. Especially not in this stretch of the year when everything starts to blend together.
So try this:
Sign up for a random activity or class.
Pick one thing each day you do just for you.
Be selfish about joy.
Don’t wait for fun to find you—build it in.
Parting Thought: Life Feels Better When You Pay Attention
These three practices—being seen, staying connected, and making things fun again—aren’t revolutionary.
But they are easy to ignore.
Especially when life gets busy.
Especially when your routines start running the show.
So consider this your reminder:
Text someone you haven’t talked to in a while.
Ask your friends better questions.
Do something selfishly joyful.
Let people into your world.
And show them you’re paying attention to theirs.
That’s how you make life feel a little more alive again.
See you next week,
— Quest