Mastering Space: Patience, AI, and the Pursuit of Happiness
Read Time: 4-6 Minutes
Today at a Glance
Here’s what you’ll get in this issue:
Why taking space between tasks is critical for mental clarity and performance.
How to use AI more effectively to deepen your decision-making process.
Reflections on happiness: Are you validating joy or truly feeling it?
Let’s dive in!
1. Create Space Between Tasks
"Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response." – Viktor Frankl
In our speed-obsessed world, we often jump from one task to another without pause. You finish a work presentation and immediately rush to the gym, the grocery store, or doom-scroll social media.
Here’s the issue: your brain needs space to decompress, process, and reset. Without it, you’re stuck in a loop of inputs and outputs, draining your energy and dulling your creativity.
Why It Matters
Memory Consolidation During Rest: Studies show that short breaks allow your brain to replay and strengthen neural patterns associated with recently learned information, improving retention.
Incubation Effect: Sometimes, stepping away from a problem allows your subconscious to work on it. The Default Mode Network (DMN) in your brain processes information unconsciously, often leading to insights or solutions later.
Attention Residue: Studies show that attention residue—lingering activation of the previous task—interferes with performance on new tasks.
Actionable Tip
Next time you finish a task, take 5–10 minutes to pause:
Take a walk.
Sit in silence.
Drive without distractions.
Let your thoughts settle, and give your brain the space to transition effectively.
2. Using AI to Think Smarter
AI is a powerful tool, but like your well-meaning significant other, it often gives quick answers without fully understanding the situation. One of the best ways to get meaningful results is to teach AI about your unique context before asking for solutions.
For example:
This week, I asked ChatGPT to help me build a personal brand identity that provides context for all our discussions.
Instead of just listing a bunch of things I know about myself, I asked it:
"Ask me one by one everything you want to know about me to build a comprehensive brand identity."
Here are some questions it asked:
What values drive your decisions, and how do they shape your worldview?
How do you define success, happiness, and a fulfilling life?
How does being a Black professional, athlete, or digital nomad add depth to your story?
Why This Works
It forces you to think more deeply about the situation, unlocking insights and perspectives you might not have considered.
It gives AI the resources it needs to offer tailored, actionable advice that can evolve over time.
I highly recommend creating a brand identity with whatever AI tool you prefer. It serves as the foundation for all conversations so you don’t have to provide as much context. Every week or so, I ask it to update my brand identity using insights from previous conversations.
A full list of the questions I went through with ChatGPT to build my brand identity can be found here.
3. Happiness: Validation vs. Reality
Lately, I’ve been reflecting on what happiness really feels like. How much of it comes from genuine joy, and how much is shaped by the need for validation?
During this bodybuilding prep phase, I’ve had to reimagine how I spend my time—cutting back on social events, drinking, and other distractions. It’s shifted my perspective on happiness. Things I once overlooked, like sitting in a coffee shop or having a peaceful morning, now stand out as deeply satisfying.
This change has also made me hyperaware of my emotions. I find myself asking, “Is this what true happiness feels like?” It’s almost like my emotions are heightened. Simple joys feel more vivid—like snowboarding without drinking and truly appreciating the fresh powder or taking the entire weekend (Friday through Sunday) to relax and do nothing, instead of trying to get a bunch of things done while simultaneously nursing a hangover.
But there’s another side. I’ve noticed how easy it is to overlook this quieter happiness in a world that pushes us to chase bigger, louder, more extravagant experiences. Hell, even I have “Seek Discomfort” tattooed on my arm. But this time has made me wonder: Are we missing out on a deeper peace by constantly seeking the next big thing and new experiences?
I don’t have a clear answer. But it’s something to consider—what does happiness look like when it’s not tied to extremes?
Reflection Question
Think about the activities that bring you joy:
Are you doing them because they genuinely fulfill you?
Do you seek external or internal validation?
What are some activities that genuinely brought you joy and why? Do they have explainable characteristics?
Recommendation Zone: Never Split the Difference
This week’s recommendation is “Never Split the Difference” by Chris Voss. Written by a former FBI hostage negotiator, it’s packed with tactics that apply to everyday situations like asking for a raise, negotiating for a house or car, or managing conflict.
Why You Should Read It
Many readers of this newsletter are at pivotal stages in their careers, looking to gain confidence in roles with greater decision-making and influence.
Learn how to turn “no” into opportunities.
Master emotional intelligence to build trust in conversations.
Gain strategies to stay calm and persuasive under pressure.
Whether negotiating your next big career move or navigating personal challenges, this book is a must-read.
Parting Thought: Your Power Is in the Space
Creating intentional space in your life—whether between tasks, decisions, or moments of joy—can transform how you approach your goals.
This week, focus on slowing down. Ask yourself:
Am I giving my mind the space it needs to grow?
Are my actions aligned to what I say my priorities are?
Give someone a compliment today. It may mean a lot more than you think.
– Quest